This is a Sirius Problem!
by eelpotter
Summary: This is just a little one-shot that I did. Sirius won't stop being stupid and Remus takes him to Hogwarts so the trio and Ginny can deal with him but they just make it worse but getting themselves drunk on accident. (AU where Sirius is alive in Harry's sixth year which would be 1996 I think...) Hope you enjoy! It's me attempting to be funny so tell me how I do.


**This is a Sirius Problem!**

Remus and Sirius we're sitting at the table in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. Remus was drinking some tea and taking notes on an interesting book he had found on fantastic beasts and where to find them and Sirius was... Being Sirius.

"Moony. Hey Moony. Hey buddy. Bud. Hey bud."

"What do you need, Sirius!?!" Remus shouted

Sirius sniggered and turned away like he hadn't said anything at all as Remus rolled his eyes and went back to his book.

Sirius tapped Remus on the shoulder. He looked up at an amused Sirius with anger written all over his face.

"I bet I can get you to say red." Sirius said.

"You know what? Fine, try me."

"What color is my hair?"

"Dark brown."

"Aha!" Sirius yelled.

"You said you could get me to say red, Sirius."

"You just did. Hehehehe!" Sirius sniggered for a good five minutes.

Remus stood up and pushed his chair back, he flood to Dumbledore's office with Sirius.

"Ah, what is this?" Dumbledore asked calmy, sneaking glance at an amused Sirius Black.

"I'm taking him to Harry and his friends. Now!" Remus yelled.

He ran to the common room and ran into Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny. Sirius was dropped off without a word but they understood as they watched Remus stomp off in relief. They all looked at each other, dreading what would come next.

"Aaaaay! It's the coolest godson in town, his name is Harry Potter!"

"Sirius please" Harry said, looking round at the others in embarrassment even though they were the only group in the common room.

Ron, who apparently had left, came back into the room with a pack of butterbeer.

"Look guys! Fred and George gave me some butterbeer! I know, I know, they're always tricking me but how could they trick me? Butterbeer is harmless." Ron unnecessarily shouted.

The whole group smiled, they all had an odd obsession with butterbeer (not an unhealthy obsession). They would always go for one at the three broomsticks on Hogsmeade weekends where they would just chat and have a good time.

"Cool, why don't you open it up?" Harry suggested.

"Hey guys, be careful, I know butterbeer is allowed but it can get you a little tipsy..." Hermione chimed in.

Ron and Harry rolled their eyes in response. None of them had noticed that Sirius was practically panting, he was so excited. He had already gotten a bottle open and was chugging it done.

"Slow down Sirius!" Harry yelled.

"Bloody hell!"

"Oh god, oh god, what if we get in trouble?"

They all eventually gave in and they each had their own bottles and we're about half way through when they felt a little tipsy.

"Why do I feel drunk when I've only had half of a bottle!?!" Ron wondered.

Hermione was checking the label and she gasped at what she found.

"Ronald Weasly, you did not check the label! The twins tricked you AGAIN! This contains tons of muggle alcohol! We should be passed out cold!" Hermione squeaked.

Nobody really listened, they were too fascinated by the ingrown hair on Sirius' forehead to care. They were giggling like mad men.

"Wow! Harry, you have really blonde h-*hiccup* hair! That's cool!" Ginny said.

"He has jet black yo-you dumbo!" Ron laughed, earning a snort from Ginny.

"Dumbo? Like the elephant! Haha, imagine I had a trunk." At this, Harry went crazy as he was on his knees laughing/crying. Sirius was dancing to a disco song, Harry and Ginny were laughing so hard that they were stumbling from their seats to the ground, Hermione was trying to read but the words were a blurry to here, which she found incredibly amusing.

Harry gasped "GUYS! WHAT IF WE INVITED DUMBLEDORE TO OUR DANCE PARTY?" Everybody thought Harry was a genius as they tripped and stumbled out of the room, each in a fit of giggles.

They arrived at Dumbledore's office and Harry said the name of a few muggle candies, the door opening on "Snickers." They walked in to Dumbledore, Snape, McGonagal, and professor Flitwick, who stared at the drunk group in shot and amusement.

"Hey my dudez, we were having a par-tay, a disco partay, and we thought we'd invite you" Harry said with no shame or embarrassment.

Ginny started to giggle and she fell to the ground, out cold. Next came Hermione, then Ron.

"Woah Sirius, I don't feel too well." Harry informed the less -drunk adult.

Suddenly, Harry threw up all over Dumbledore's pensive and then started laughing.

"What if my puke had memories?" And then he was out cold along with his girlfriend and two best friends.

"Sirius, WHAT is the meaning of this?" Dumbledore asked. Sirius smiled sheepishly.

"I don't really know what happened, but I'm pretty sure that butterbeer was what intoxicated us thanks to the Weasly twins." Sirius said drunkenly.

"Ah, I see, I believe this has happened with James Potter in the past. Like father like son, I assume." Dumbledore said.

*Sirius fell to the ground*

The End.

A/N: This was just a funny one-shot, I hope you enjoyed it and had a few laughs!

\- Ella 3


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